Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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