my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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