Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
You've changed since you got that strap on
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
