found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Edward fifth and chaser hands
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
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