Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
