I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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