But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Randomize
