Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Randomize
