i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
