Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
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