Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Randomize
