How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
