there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
