Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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