one might say we're banned from that church
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
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