I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
