in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
