i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Randomize
