Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
