no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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