Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I'm experimenting with sincerity
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Randomize
