Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
The air was thick with penises
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize