If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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