oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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