Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
