idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
