sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Everyone says I win the strip club
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
