Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
