Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
is this the sara with the beer cane?
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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