Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize