were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
