He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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