Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
