Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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