I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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