i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
