by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize