im about as happy as oj after his trial
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Randomize
