I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Randomize
