Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Randomize
