Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize
