wat bout pragnant strippers??
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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