so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
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