this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
