Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
