Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
