We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
