Moan for me like Helen Keller
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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