My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Randomize
