we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
vagina is talking i cant
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize