No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize